Movies are subjective. You like what you like, I'll like what I like. But these are the ABSOLUTE definitive ranking of all 11 Star Wars Movies. (Nine Episodic Skywalker-centric stories and two side stories) There can be NO debate. We'll all clearly agree on these selections. Thank you and enjoy.
Let's start with the duds...
11 - Episode One: The Phantom Menace (1999)
The pod race was cool. The premise was awesome. But the intricacies of Senate policy debate do not make for a good movie. Oh yeah, and then there's Jar Jar Binks. One of the most regrettable characters in movie history. Also, side note. Natalie Portman plays a dual role in this one, but it's never really acknowledged until the final act. This new trilogy got off to a rough start, and it was difficult to change public opinion after this. Cause I maintain there's some good stuff in the next two films and they are pretty decent. This one is just such a monumental failure that it hampered the two movies that followed.
10 - Episode Two: Attack of the Clones (2002)
Yoda goes off. Creating a cool movie moment where we see what Yoda is capable of. Scratching the surface of the Clone Wars was a great idea. Fertile ground for side stories (and a TV show later to come). Conflicted Anakin is worse than Moody Kylo Ren. Because Hayden Christensen is a much worse actor than Adam Driver. Natalie Portman appears to be phoning it in by this point in the trilogy. There's some worthwhile stuff in here, but compared to the other movies in the series, this still ranks pretty low.
9 - Solo: A Star Wars Story (2018)
Another movie with a good story, but a horrific lead actor. The studio wanted a "nobody" in the iconic Han Solo role which served as an origin story. Surrounded by such talent as Woody Harrelson, Emilia Clarke, Donald Glover, and Thandie Newton. Alden Ehrenreich never really clicked as the pilot of the Millennium Falcon. Think I'm wrong? Think I'm biased? Maybe I'm being too harsh? Alden has not been in a movie since. Not a single one. I feel validated. Ron Howard filled the movie with a lot of whimsy and fun. But when the center of this movie is dragging everyone else down, it's tough to recover from. I like the story. I like the twists at the end. Glover is MAJESTIC as Lando Calrissian. Again, a fine entry to the Star Wars Universe, but when compared to the others it pales in comparison.
8 - Episode Nine: Rise of Skywalker (2019)
A stellar first two acts are hurt by a confusing and rushed final act that ends with an all-time cop out. The action is plentiful, the story moves quick. This movie is fine, I had a good time. I'll need to rewatch it before knowing for sure that this is where it belongs. JJ Abrams took over late in the production process and essentially made the ending a retread of Return of the Jedi. He seemed too scared to take the story in his own direction. Episode Nine undermines the previous chapter, attempting to undo the unpopular events of The Last Jedi (which was a better movie because it had its own identity). I'm trying not to focus on the negative with this movie, because I did enjoy it. But there are legitimate criticisms to lob in this movie's direction.
7 - Episode Seven: The Force Awakens (2015)
The kickoff to the newest trilogy introduced new characters and brought back many of our old favorites. We saw beloved characters stories come to an end. We watched new alliances form. We were teased about what was to come in future movies. So...who cares if it was essentially a retelling of A New Hope? I like the new characters. It's a fun, albeit mindless, piece of nostalgic entertainment. But this movie is a bit like cotton candy. All fluff. Not a ton of substance. It works for what it is and what it needed to be at the time. But after all these years the shine has worn off just a bit.
6 - Episode Eight: The Last Jedi (2017)
George Lucas lifted the idea for A New Hope from two places. The TV show and comic character Buck Rogers. As well as the 1958 Akira Kurosawa film "The Hidden Fortress". The Last Jedi often feels like a throwback to the old samurai movie. The fight scenes feel very western-y. Last Jedi dared to take the series to new places and be more than a simple nostalgia trip. The Last Jedi had ambition. Which, of course, the internet hated. Director Rian Johnson is a magnificent storyteller. His effort was not appreciated by many. But the harder I champion this film, I've found a lot of people feel the way I do.
5 - Episode Three: Revenge of the Sith (2005)
This title is a clever homage to the early title of "Return of the Jedi", and it's BY FAR the best of the prequel trilogy. That's right. I like a movie in the prequel trilogy. Fight me. The final act is incredible, even though you pretty much know what's going to happen. Hayden Christensen finally gets to put all his whining to work. The creation of Darth Vader is a memorable moment in the series history. From the hillside fire to the first time we see Anakin rise in his chair with the helmet and all it's all the reasons you got to the movies. Pure spectacle. It closes the gap, working as a nice little prologue to A New Hope.
4 - Episode Six: Return of the Jedi (1983)
Very similar to the newest film, Rise of Skywalker, Jedi starts out pretty great. Two amazing first acts, and then a third act clearly designed to sell merch and appease children. (Ewoks are adorable, but not a practical military strategy) It uses the momentum from Empire to deliver a pitch perfect final battle between Luke and Anakin Skywalker. While saccharine, it gave us the ending it had to. After Empire, you had to send the fans home happy. In this story, there's really only one way to do that. Endings are hard. People don't realize that enough. Look at Game of Thrones. A show/movie can be so well written, so creative, but it paints itself into a corner with no feasible way to end. Don't ever ask for too much out of your endings.
3 - Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Taking place in between Episodes Three and Four, Rogue One told the story of Jyn Erso who was attempting to steal the plans for the Death Star. What you had here in the first Star Wars movie that was not a part of the "Skywalker Saga" was a spy movie dressed up as a Star Wars movie. A brilliant idea that was simple and wonderfully executed. We don't give this movie enough credit in the Star Wars universe. Going forward, I'm much more interested in movies like this and TV shows like The Mandalorian more than I am the goings on of the Skywalker Family. Give me different genre movies in outer space and I'm fine. A horror movie/slasher movie aboard an Imperial ship. A detective noir style movie starring two Storm Troopers. There's literally an endless galaxy of ideas here.
2 - Episode Four: A New Hope (1977)
The one that started it all. The older I get, the more I like this movie. I used to think Luke was pretty whiny in this first film (which in hindsight might explain why Anakin and Kylo Ren were also whiny roles). I also think A New Hope doesn't get enough credit for dropping us in the literal middle of the story and not losing its audience. The acting and production aren't great, but it has sort of an "Us Against the World" charm. It is an iconic movie that not only created a series of movies beloved by millions, but it also inspired multiple generations of kids to shoot for the stars.
1 - Episode Five: The Empire Strikes Back (1980)
The unquestioned best movie of the saga is the darkest. With an all-time great plot twist, Empire set itself apart from the pack by having ambition. By daring to go there. By nailing the landing in the next installment. I couldn't imagine watching this and then having to wait three years to find out what happened next. It's the definitive act two of a three act story. It ends on the down note, for the hero to rise up in the third act. Too many movies are scared to deliver any victory to the bad guy whatsoever. Your story lacks stakes if the bad guys are inept. Avengers: Infinity War/Endgame works because it ended on that down note and created high stakes. I would imagine a lot of that influence is from Empire. The Dark Knight was a downer second act of a three act story. And it's one of the best movies ever. Just like Empire.