This is a guest column each week during football season, written by superfan J.B. Shucker.
This week The Big Red Thrashing Machine gets pulled out of the barn by a team of studs lead by Trail Boss Bo and his hired hands for a live battle with some visitors from the left coast. Like a school bus load of 4th graders on their first trip to a farm, these boys from the land of cement ponds and fake blondes should be in for a real treat.
And as usual the Big Red congregation will be asked “Do you have running water at your house yet?” and “Have you stopped using outhouses?” Some Big Red fans will be able to elegantly answer, “Nope.”
Now, the Bruins bring in a haul of Sunday football talent to play but I don’t think that they have ever played in a house quite like Grandma’s house before. I hear that our boys will be in coal black outfits to impress the youngin’s but I will be more impressed by their deeds than their duds.
They even got live picture box feed for the whole nation to watch this duel of Midwest vs. Far West. The Cornstalk Jocks from the Boondocks will have a mighty set of chores to do before they close up shop…..but I got a funny feeling like a grasshopper up a pant leg that this could be worth watching for the full dollar.
It won’t be easy… but they pull their pants up and helmet down just like our boys do.
Cornstalk Jocks - 36
Bears in Baby Blue – 34